From a very young age you’ve been inundated with other people’s rules – parents, teachers, friends – helpful principles, friendly advice, and little pointers to help you get on in life. So, how do you free yourself from these false or unhelpful beliefs that have somehow become ingrained in the deepest recesses of your mind?

In this brand new book, international bestselling author Richard Templar exposes the most common imposter rules, and offers a refreshing perspective and a new way of thinking.

Above all, Templar helps you master the ability to truly think for yourself, and follow a path that you’ve chosen, rather than blindly following someone else’s.

Introduction     xii

1. Success is a good job earning lots of money     2

Rule 1: Success Is What You Say It Is

2. Some people are just born lucky     4

Rule 2: Don’t Envy Other People

3. You need the right qualifications     6

Rule 3: Exams Aren’t the Be All and End All

4. Your parents are always right     8

Rule 4: Don’t Expect Your Parents to Be Perfect

5. Your parents are responsible for how you turn out     10

Rule 5: Give Your Parents a Break

6. The world is against you     12

Rule 6: You’re Responsible for Your Own Life

7. We all have an absolute right to be respected     14

Rule 7: There’s a Balance Between the Right to Respect and Tolerance

8. You can choose your friends but you can’t choose your family    16

Rule 8: Your Siblings Should Be Your Best Friends for Life

9. Teacher knows best     18

Rule 9: Doing Well at School Is Not the Same as Doing Well in Life

10. Have something to say for yourself     20

Rule 10: If You Find It Hard to Talk, Try Listening

11. Some people are just difficult     22

Rule 11: No One Chooses to Be Difficult without a Reason

12. You can’t be cheerful if you’re in pain     24

Rule 12: Pain Doesn’t Have to Make You Miserable

13. Good work speaks for itself     26

Rule 13: No One at Work Will Know How Good You Are Unless You Tell Them

14. Do what it takes to get what you want     28

Rule 14: Don’t Emotionally Blackmail People

15. A place for everything, and everything in its place     30

Rule 15: It’s Not Morally Superior to Be Tidy

16. It matters what other people think     32

Rule 16: Don’t Live for Other People’s Approval

17. Give as good as you get     34

Rule 17: You Get What You Give

18. Stick with your own kind     36

Rule 18: Your Friends Don’t All Need to Be Like You

19. The best things in life are free     38

Rule 19: Everything Worth Having Hurts

20. You can change people     40

Rule 20: Don’t Try to Change People

21. It’s where you’re going that matters, not where you came from     42

Rule 21: Be Proud of Your Roots

22. Friends are for life     44

Rule 22: Friends Come and Go

23. Mistakes are a bad thing     46

Rule 23: Mistakes Can Be Good

24. Be a friend to everybody     48

Rule 24: You Don’t Have to Like Everyone

25. …And everybody will be your friend     50

Rule 25: …And Not Everyone Will Like You

26. If you don’t like it, tough     52

Rule 26: Remember You Have a Choice

27. You need to get your chores over with     54

Rule 27: Life’s All About the Little Things

28. Stay true to your dreams     56

Rule 28: Priorities Change Over the Years

29. People have a right to know     58

Rule 29: Know How to Keep a Secret

30. Face your fears     60

Rule 30: Replace the Bad Thoughts

31. Respect the elderly     62

Rule 31: Respect Everyone

32. Look after number one     64

Rule 32: Helping Other People Makes You Feel Good about Yourself

33. If you’re in the firing line, keep your head down    66

Rule 33: They Can’t Walk All Over You Unless You’re Lying Down

34. Just ignore the bullies     68

Rule 34: Don’t Let ’Em Bully You

35. Think on your feet     70

Rule 35: Be in Control

36. What you do is more important than why you do it     72

Rule 36: Be Honest with Yourself

37. You can judge a book by its cover     74

Rule 37: Everyone Has a Backstory

38. “What about me?”     76

Rule 38: It’s Not All about You

39. Just once won’t hurt     78

Rule 39: Don’t Let Bad Habits Get a Foot in the Door

40. Be spontaneous     80

Rule 40: Listen to the Voices in Your Head

41. Take one step at a time     82

Rule 41: If You Want Big Things to Change, You Have to Make Big Changes

42. The best people will be there for you for life     84

Rule 42: People Come and Go, and It’s OK

43. Enjoy yourself while you’re young     86

Rule 43: Your Body Is for Life

44. Borrowing is OK so long as you can pay it back     88

Rule 44: Don’t Get into Debt

45. Be generous     90

Rule 45: Never Lend Money Unless You’re Prepared to Write It Off

46. Believe you’re the best     92

Rule 46: Know Your Real Worth

47. Don’t allow people to make you feel bad     94

Rule 47: The Only Thing You Can Control Is You

48. Some people just get to you     96

Rule 48: No One Can Make You Feel Anything

49. You can’t help how you feel     98

Rule 49: You Feel What You Think

50. You don’t need words to show you appreciate someone     100

Rule 50: Tell People How Important They Are

51. The Internet makes you anonymous     102

Rule 51: The Rules Don’t Stop Online

52. Always seek to improve yourself     104

Rule 52: Accept Your Shortcomings

53. Strive for perfection     106

Rule 53: Perfection Can Be a Handicap

54. You are the product of your genes     108

Rule 54: You Are the Sum of Your Experiences (So Make Them Good)

55. Tomorrow is another day     110

Rule 55: How You Spend Your Day Is How You Spend Your Life

56. Always get off on the right foot from the start     112

Rule 56: Bide Your Time to Make a Good Impression

57. Confident people know where they’re going     114

Rule 57: Everyone Else Is as Lost as You

58. Stand out from the crowd     116

Rule 58: There’s a Fine Line Between Being Ubercool and Being a Total Jerk

59. Appearances matter     118

Rule 59: Be Happy with the Way You Look

60. It’s just a drop in the ocean     120

Rule 60: The Insignificant Is Important

61. The job comes first     122

Rule 61: Don’t Mistake Your Career for Your Life

62. Get it all out in the open     124

Rule 62: Avoid Conflict

63. If you know you’re in the right, don’t back down     126

Rule 63: Don’t Be Afraid of Compromise

64. Give as good as you get     128

Rule 64: Keep the Moral High Ground

65. It’s good to let your feelings out     130

Rule 65: Don’t Trample on Other People’s Emotions

66. No one is perfect     132

Rule 66: Be on the Side of the Angels, Not the Beasts

67. Meet your deadlines     134

Rule 67: Keep Ahead of Deadlines

68. Give good advice     136

Rule 68: Don’t Give Advice

69. Let people know when you’re right     138

Rule 69: Never Say “I Told You So”

70. Stick to what you’re good at     140

Rule 70: Stretch Yourself

71. You’ve a right to be treated fairly     142

Rule 71: Stop Expecting Life to Be Fair

72. The more you learn about a subject, the more of an expert you become     144

Rule 72: The More You Know, the More You Don’t

73. If you’re going to do something, do it properly     146

Rule 73: You Don’t Have to Jump in the Deep End

74. Stick with what you know     148

Rule 74: Step Out of Your Comfort Zone

75. People will judge you by what you own     150

Rule 75: Don’t Try to Keep Up with the Joneses

76. Hide your mistakes     152

Rule 76: Remember You Could Be Wrong—Someone Has to Be

77. Live in the present     154

Rule 77: Keep Perspective

78. Know what you want     156

Rule 78: You Don’t Have to Know What You Want

79. Guilt tells you where you’re going wrong     158

Rule 79: Don’t Do Guilt

80. Someone will make it better     160

Rule 80: Pick Yourself Up (No One Else Will Do It for You)

81. Think through your problems     162

Rule 81: Thinking Hard Doesn’t Always Help

82. Narrow down your options     164

Rule 82: Look at All the Options

83. Trust no one     166

Rule 83: Trust Everyone

84. Trust everyone     168

Rule 84: Trust No One

85. Sometimes you need a good whine     170

Rule 85: There Are People Who Whine, and People Who Just Get on with It

86. Don’t sacrifice yourself for a relationship     172

Rule 86: It’s the Compromises that Make Relationships Worth Having

87. Feelings should be rational     174

Rule 87: Feelings Aren’t Right or Wrong—They Just Are

88. Eat, Drink, and Be Merry     176

Rule 88: Stay Alive

89. I want doesn’t get     178

Rule 89: Ask for What You Want

90. If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it    180

Rule 90: Look Up

91. Find yourself a safe job     182

Rule 91: Follow Your Passion

92. Protect your property     184

Rule 92: People Are More Important than Things

93. You can’t change horses in midstream     186

Rule 93: It’s Never Too Late to Start Following the Real Rules