Avoid "Shirtsleeves to Shirtsleeves" by Finding Your Voice Growing up in a family with significant wealth or a family business can often feel like an exercise in silence. What should you ask? Whom should you ask? When? Is it ever right to talk about such things?
The Voice of the Rising Generation speaks directly to those who find themselves living in that silence, the so-called "next generation." Great wealth or a family business can act like a "black hole," sapping the dreams and aspirations of future generations who feel that they can never measure up to the fortune's founder. This book, written by a psychologist, an educator, and a wise counselor who single-handedly changed the landscape of family wealth, diagnoses with economy and precision the cause of entitlement and dependency. It is not too much money or too few chores. It is the failure of rising generations to individuate, that is, to pursue their dreams, develop their resilience, and find their voice.
Many books are addressed to parents and grandparents who worry about the effects of wealth on their descendants. Almost alone in the field, this book speaks directly to 20-, 30- and 40-somethings, encouraging them—literally, giving them courage—to meet the challenge of integrating wealth's power into their lives, rather than disappearing into the black hole. Readers will:
- Come to understand the true causes of entitlement and dependency
- Identify the psychological characteristics of the rising generation and the challenges proper to its development
- Clarify their own dreams, work, and vocation
- Navigate personal relationships and communication within the context of wealth
- Recognize the special challenges faced when rising is delayed until mid-life.
If you are a young person who is starting your life's journey and wondering about the effects of parental gifts, trusts, or a family business, this book will offer you questions, reflections, and lessons-learned to help you find your own way. If you are a parent, grandparent, elder, or mentor, The Voice of the Rising Generation can serve the young people in your life as a gift more precious than gold.
Table of Contents:
Preface xi
Acknowledgments xiii
Introduction 1
A Well-Known Family 1
The Challenge 2
The Journey 3
Our Approach 6
Aids to Navigation 7
Chapter 1 Setting Sail 13
The Black Hole 14
Talking about Silence 17
The Very Good Steward 19
The Meteor 19
Froggy 20
The Parallel Universe 21
The Anxious Heir 22
Mr. Reputable 22
The Grand Giver 23
Testing the Boundary 23
Mentor 26
Chapter 2 Rosy-Fingered Dawn 29
Awakening 29
Rising 30
Slings and Arrows 36
Chapter 3 Self-Knowledge 43
The Center 43
Internal and External 44
Dreams 45
Strengths and Hurdles 48
Individuation 51
Externals 54
The Balance Sheet 56
Chapter 4 Facing the Waves 61
Getting Away 61
Taking the Leap 63
Work 63
Relationships 73
Communication 78
Leaving Ithaca 81
Chapter 5 The Middle Passage 85
The Island of the Lotus-Eaters 85
The Middle Passage 87
A Forceful Hand 89
Self-Advocacy 93
Ownership 96
Leadership 98
Parenting in the Middle Passage 100
Questions for Rising on Your Own 102
Conclusion 107
Another Well-Known Family 107
Our Journey Thus Far 109
Searching for Elders 112
Returning to Mentor 115
Flying Away 118
Appendix 121
Questions for Reflection from the End of the Chapters 121
From the Introduction 121
From Chapter 1 121
From Chapter 2 121
From Chapter 3 122
From Chapter 4 122
From Chapter 5 122
From the Conclusion 122
Additional Tools 122
Possible Educational Pathways 123
For the Individual Journey 123
For Possible Workshops 124
For a Possible Family Gathering 125
Session One: Knowing Ourselves 126
Session Two: Resilience 128
Session Three: Action 129
About the Authors 133
Index 137
